Overcome self-doubt

How gorgeous was this May? I hope that you are enjoying the spring. We for ourselves, aka Louise and me, cannot get enough of being outside.

In the last Newsletter-Blog, we talked about some key lessons that I came back with, from our trip to Nepal. Well, I left out one, because I believe it needs to be treated as a standalone subject:

Key Lesson #6 – No more self-doubt!
Self-doubt. I know that it can affect many of us in many different ways. One thing is clear – getting rid of the belief that we are not worthy, or that we are not good enough to never make it (ever), is probably not such a bad idea, don’t you think?

Self-doubt

When in doubt
When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt.
Honore de Balzac

Self-doubt has a way of penetrating under your skin.
What if it isn’t good enough? What if I am not good enough? What will the people think? What if I am not worthy? Am I doing the right thing?

Rejection.
Isn’t it something we fear? Being rejected, being neglected, not being loved – or not being able to love.

It starts in the cradle, and continues to grow as we are infants. We thrive to be better than our siblings, to get more attention from our parents, and we crave to hear this one thing: I am proud of you, darling.

Is self-doubt then self-preservation?


Protection
You grow up receiving all sorts of messages, making experiences, storing many different things in your mind. Most of everything that you take in goes straight into the subconscious, because there is only so much that you can consciously process.

The negative mind of course has a mission to protect you (the negative, positive and neutral mind are the three minds that we have). Hence, to any undertaking that you may have, it will go and say: wait a minute!

Wasn’t there something once, and then you did that – and wasn’t that awful?

If you spend your lifetime storing negative messages and beliefs in you, and not clear what Yogi Bhajan calls the “poop of the subconscious”, then no, self-doubt is not from a place of protection or self-preservation, but a sign that you are not ready to move on.


Change
Am I making a much too controversial statement for you there?
Look at this. When does self-doubt appear?
When you are scared? When there is uncertainty involved? When you expect too much?

There is only one certainty in life and that is uncertainty!

The faster you accept to lean into uncertainty and be comfortable with it, the easier it will become to accept doubt.

Do I feel self-doubt? Hell yeah. We don’t have all the answers, but we can go on a journey to discover life, and adapt ourselves to whatever the circumstance requires.


Faith
Doubt is related to faith and trust. Believe that you are born into this world to fulfil a purpose, and that the universe has your back – this is a super empowering belief & doubt becomes unnecessary.

You have about 1.000 thoughts per blink of the eye. If you picked up one, and you are consciously thinking about it (f. ex. a career change, having a baby, going on a world trip), then it probably is meant to be.

Otherwise it would just have passed you by, like the 999 others.


Self-worth

No amount of self-improvement can make up for any lack of self-acceptance.
Dr. Robert Holden

The Japanese say you have three faces. The first face, you show to the world. The second face, you show to your close friends, and your family. The third face, you never show anyone. It is the truest reflection of who you are.

Our relationship with ourselves determines our relationship with everything else. If you accept yourself the way you are, in all your messy magnificence, then the authentic you – the only you there is – will no longer need to have three faces.

You are, who you are.
If they don’t like you, then that’s their problem – not yours.

As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are – what others say is irrelevant.
Nic Sheff


Overcome self-doubt

Here is my short list of ideas to get out of self-doubt:

Accept it
Find a way to be okay with self-doubt. Don’t justify it, don’t judge it. It will go the same way as it came.

Talk about it
Sometimes you need advice and some helpful hints. It can help a lot to talk about whatever you are doubting. Worst case scenario, you have to start over. In most cases however, just some minor adjustments to the plan will suffice.

Learn from it
If you fall 7 times you get up 8! There is absolutely nothing wrong with learning from an experience that did not go as sweet as. Errors are there to help you see further. You don’t have to be fault free.

Imperfection is a part of our shared human experience.
Bruna Martinuzzi

Practice self-compassion
Be kind to yourself. While it’s easy to extend compassion to others, it is often harder to include oneself in this circle.

Value your Self
Don’t underestimate yourself: you have come so far, maybe got a diploma, a higher degree, or a top-notch job; maybe you raised kids or did some volunteering – so far, so good! What could possibly go wrong now?

Mantra
Mantras are projected words that will help you alter your Consciousness. The Miracle Mantra Dhan Dhan Ram Das Guru makes the impossible become possible. Why not give it a chant?

Ramdesh Kaur says about this mantra:
At times when there is tragedy so great your heart aches with the thought of it, there is only one mantra that comes to mind: the Miracle Mantra, which lives in the realm of the heart and operates on a frequency beyond comprehension. When I need miracles, I call upon this mantra, “Dhan Dan Ram Das Gur.” It brings in the miraculous powers of Guru Ram Das, Lord of Miracles.


In Conclusion

Try and not to be too hard on yourself. Sometimes doubts may come from a place of preservation and protection, but often they are just tiny monsters trying to control you. Don’t let them. There is time to reinvent yourself, to make changes, to take new chances. This life’s journey is about taking with you as much experience as you can.

Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.
Suzy Kassem

Wahe Guru

Light & Love

Leave Your Comment

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.